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Each week, 1 student from the class will start the posting extravaganza! After they have posted, all other students are required to write a response to the original posts or in response to other comments from the original posts. Other readers/followers are welcome to join in on the conversation as you wish. Youth and Recreation pastors... we welcome your comments and insights!
This can be a tricky situation because you will always have the competitive people in your group. Although it's always fun to have some competition, there is always a boundary for this because eventually it can start hurting feelings. A way that we can do this I believe is always keep changing up the rules of your game. Make it seem more interactive for the students who aren't as good at your game. You can also split up the talents in your group to be on separate teams. That way it's not one team who is extremely good, and then the other team who isn't as talented. Make these competitive students compete against each other that way they can have their competitive fun, while the others in the group can also have the same amount of fun.
ReplyDeleteAnother way you can do this is by limiting the prizes for this. If there is a prize involved if you win the game, then the students will seem to want to be more competitive and play more aggressive. Although, you want everyone to participate, you don't want things to get extremely "physical". I would make it to where there is really no special prize for the winning team, it would just be a "great job everyone."
Also try to play games that focus a lot on teamwork instead of make it an individual game all of the time. This will allow the kids in your group to work together and focus on teamwork and including others who aren't as "skilled" as you are.
There are many other ways that you can make a really competitive sport more fun.
One way to do this is to use different types of games such as puzzle type games. While you will still have the competitive people in your group being competitive, you now allow your less competitive types a greater chance of having fun.
ReplyDeleteAnother way of doing this is to allow a couple of the less competitive people in your group to pick the teams on some nights. The teams may have a better shot at being evened out instead of the possibility of one team being dominantly competitive players.
Changing up the game in the middle can also be a way to limit the competitiveness of players. Also create a penalty within the game for the team if anyone is caught trying to cheat. This will give the competitive players a bit of a disadvantage in their minds because they are more likely to try and cheat to win the game.
I think we have to play a variety of games with the teens. They will each excel at different things, so it is important to provide a mix of physical games, some dealing with problem-solving, etc. They way teens react during a game can say a lot about their talents. For example, natural leaders will devise plans and implement them by assesing the strengths of the others in their groups. Games should be tweeked to fit each group. If you know you have physically competative students who theaten to dominate a more physical game, you have to adjust rules to make sure everyone is contributing. Shaping the 'win' around everyone's effort can be powerful and let students know they helped. We can't make a huge deal out of who wins, as that can encourage students to try really hard without regards to their teammates or the help they could provide because they know they'll get positive praise from you. We have to be able to adapt. If we see unequal participation in any activity we have to be able to hit pause, make some adjustments, and continue.
ReplyDeleteOne simple solution could be to address individual teens if their level of competitiveness is starting to negatively affect other students. Pull them aside and explain that fun does not have to equal winning.
We need to encourage and provide team-based games, sometimes we assign the teams and sometimes we let the group pick their teams. Then from that point of being in a team we need to encourage communication within the group, without communication the group can become a group of individually competitive participants. We need to provide a variety of games that require different special skill sets, kids love making a difference and if the planned game goes from a game that they aren’t very good at to a game that they can excel at then it makes them feel good. But we also need to reinforce that it wasn’t the individual that won the game, but rather the entire team.
ReplyDeleteI feel that offering a prize as the end goal of winning only makes teens more competitive which is something that can cloud the point of them game. So I feel that if a prize is what is needed to determine teens then make it something small (everyone on the team gets a can of pop or something equivalent to that). From what I’ve witnessed growing up going to summer camp is that some friendly competition is okay when it comes to sports. One of the coveted titles that kids would strive for every year was to be the cabin that won the Schism Tournament (A game similar to Volleyball otherwise known as Nuke’m). As kids would progress from elementary school to middle school and eventually high school, the winning team would be different every year but it built a community of friendly competition that built friendships over time.
If an overly competitive attitude continues with one or several individuals then pulling them aside and explaining why their attitudes aren’t acceptable or Christ-like and if necessary turn it into a lesson for the whole group.
Watching my youth leaders growing up I noticed they took a couple steps that seemed really minor at the time but really changed the atmosphere of the games and is something I want to carry forward. I think the first step many steps that would be to keep the attitude of the game lighthearted. When the group as a whole understand that the intention of the game is not to complete more over it is for play and team building I think that's one step we could take. Another was already mentioned, but to remove the focus off the idea of an award would greatly increase the intentions of having fun and bringing the group closer together.
ReplyDeleteAnother step that can be taken is just in the game that we as leaders choose. We may not have to take away the idea of a winner, but we have to find something that develops a group way of thinking inside of the game. When we establish that we are out to have fun and grow closer together I thin that it makes all the difference.
Finally I think that if the students understand the message (if one is in mind when playing the game) I think that the students may have a think more about their actions when approaching a game. Rather than just jumping in with the idea of going in to win, find a way to use that game as a breakthrough to reach the kids if that is what works.
I think that in today's culture, it is important to learn the art of healthy competition, since competition is such a prevalent emphasis in society. I think games can be a good, practical way of teaching within the context of our spiritual lives and building community. Learning to win graciously, and lose respectfully can really build character.
ReplyDeleteIn terms of games within youth ministry, competition can be taught through group games as opposed to individual games, so as to not single anyone out as a "loser." However, group games can spark a healthy competition, as well as build character, teach teens to think outside the box, and enhance team-bonding. I personally really like games that require teams to work together and think creatively to problem-solve.
Being intentional with the games we choose, planning teachable lessons to correspond to have a lasting effect on students after all the fun and games are over, can be really beneficial and build character in young people. In a society that pushes competition, games can be used in moderation, with healthy consideration, to be used to challenge and grow students, drawing them together rather than pulling them apart.
I think this question is a very legit statement that needs a lot of reflection. I know as a parent, this is one I struggle with concerning my son. That is, I want my son to love to play games just the sake of fun, not for the glory of winning, but how do I go about teaching him that?
ReplyDeleteOne way I think we can go about combating the threat of competition is playing more games that emphasize teamwork. What I mean is, we can play more games that promote a unity between the students instead of pinning the students against each other. Now, with some games (like the foot stomping game), I don't think that kind of competition is too dangerous because it's not about a kind of athletic ability (like basketball or something). But with the games that do allow students with more athletic ability to flourish, I think we just need to be more cautious with how we go about playing the game.
One thing about team games that I do not like is that they still emphasize winning. One alternative to this is to have each team be in charge of a section of the ultimate game, but still have all the teams needing to work together to accomplish the overall goal. Now, the overall goal is not about winning, but is instead about accomplishing some goal together as students. This allows some competitiveness (as motivation, I guess), but still lets the students not feel like they failed if they do not get done as quickly as another team.
Overall, I think we just need to be intentional in our game-planning. I think we need to choose more games that allow us to help one another in unity rather than pinning us against one another.
Today's kids are taught that life is a competition. Everything they do, there is either a winner or a loser, and they don't want to be the loser. I think it's important that kids learn what healthy competition is and how to win or lose graciously. A lot of youth and children's pastors do a really nice job of instilling this in children.
ReplyDeleteThe youth pastor that I worked with past summer did something really cool. In one of his games, it was getting pretty competitive. He told the teams that a prize was involved, but he never told them who would get it. After the game ended, the winning team assumed they would get the prize, like usual. They did not win very graciously, and were being poor sports about it. To their surprise, he gave the prize to the losing team, because they lost with grace and continued to be good sports about it.
The cool thing about that was the kids were rewarded for losing graciously, and the winners learned that it's not all about winning. I think that kind of thing is pretty cool and is a good way to demonstrate that type of behavior to kids.
In today's society, kids and teenagers are being taught that winning is one of the most important things. Even just winning at something small, it brings such joy and satisfaction. Being a person who is extremely competitive, winning is rewarding, but the worst thing is when the winner is not humble about it.
ReplyDeleteI think that something that we could do to try and fix the way our culture sees competition is playing games that are competitive, but then rewarding everyone that participated. I believe that competition is a good thing, and that it makes for wonderful learning experiences. Some people do not have that competitive spirit, and that is okay, but I do not want the people who are to think that it is wrong to feel that way.
I think that it is the way that we are taught to compete that makes such a huge difference. Showing grace, and humbleness is an important part of it for me, and a reason that I find it enjoyable. So, overall, I think that we should try and play games that are competitive but then teach the participants that winning is fun and rewarding, but the way that we react is really what makes us true victors. Not a physical trophy or medal, but the way that we react to all situations.
Never in my life have I been the sporty person (even when I played sports as a kid), so I completely understand this difficult situation. The culture we live in is, in fact, a very competition-oriented one, so we have to work within that worldview. The kids in the youth group that are competitive will continue to be so, no matter what we say or do; it is in their nature. However, I wouldn't write it off completely because competition is very healthy in moderation.
ReplyDeleteWe will still have this hurdle to overcome in the form of students that do not get anything from competition. In those situations, I think it would be wise to find some co-operative games. Co-op games achieve multiple goals: they take competition out of the equation and they also establish "groupness."
I agree with some of you in that I have never been super coordinated or competitive when it comes to games. I have always been more into the goofy games that have a purpose.
ReplyDeleteI think the best thing we can do is judge each individual situation. If someone is acting too competitive - improvise the rules. If someone is feeling left out, try to include them. Treat everything case by case. I was that wallflowerr.